Dear Seth,

This week was all about rites of passage.  You asked confidently and we let you have at it.  You started with Yousef’s shirt.  Last week we got two bags of hand me downs for him.  You immediately got out the fabric paint and proclaimed that you were going to decorate them.  You did a few samplers last week, but Monday was masterpiece day!  Aside from taking painting  initiative, you have become very responsible about your permanent paint.  You organize it all into specific boxes and fastidiously store it on the top of the dryer so that “the little kids” will not get into it.

On Tuesday you marked your fire engine keys.  This activity was undertaken with the utmost seriousness.  The application of “toe polish” is a grave responsibility.  It musent touch the skin and it’s not to be wasted.  I can’t remember the last time I saw you so focused.  However, I was not surprised, fireman business is serious and you are a consumate professional in all aspects of fire management.

Wednesday was the “moment of truth”.  You asked Mattie “mano a grandmamo” if you could paint the play house permanent burgundy *.   She was very level and said she trusted your best judgement, and was sure you would paint something wonderful.   Well you carefully painted a row of shinges and the interior of the dutch door.  It turned out to be more of a union job.  In fact when I came over to photograph, you said, “Mommy there are no cameras allowed on this building site, it bothers the workers”.

I retreated, but not after stealing a few shots paparazzi style.

Love + Mommy

* Grandma Jan introduced Seth to the color burgundy… thanks Grandma Jan it’s been a lovely addition to our spectrum of pinks and reds!

I started oil painting today.  I’ve been toying with a reacquainting for a while now, but couldn’t find the hook.  Hook meaning “what to paint”.  If you are going to go to the trouble of committing something to oils than it ought to be “good”.  Also in the mix was the desire to work more abstractly.  I get caught up in drawing things, and wind up with lots of good representations of things, but not much underlying feeling or exploration.  The hook came when I glanced over at my favorite quilt painting that I had hug in Seth’s space.  Each square was it’s own lovely canvas.  Lots of inner peace and lovely spacial relations.  Perfect for my oil paint agenda.

As I applied the paint I found myself glancing at the quilt less and less.  I let go of the reconstruction goal, and let the paintings grow into their own medium.  I guess it’s all about surrender.  Letting the medium inform your path.  Engaging in something that is entirely process based does not come easily.  By nature I am a fairly focused person with subconscious goals in mind at all times.  One of the few areas of my life that is not goal oriented is interaction with my son.  I limit my agenda around him so that he can explore life, and I can observe/reflect on the process.  I look forward to having a summer of painting projects.  Projects that are not planned and leave room for surprise and new brushstrokes.

Thanks RB for preparing the boards, lending your brush collection and cleaning the rat scat off the lovely easel.  Thanks for the easel Jaya!